Fukyu

[garyg]

This challenge is not an original idea.
A dear friend to many of us, Micheal McNeilly, proposed this challenge a few years ago on another venue. The two year anniversary of his death just passed, and I consider this to be a fitting rememberance.
I'll paste his original challenge, and a few of his examples just to get you started.

garyg

Fukyu, An artform for the times.

Originally posted by mcn on 5/23/00

The Fuckyu is a virtual artform.
A slender branch of the Turdku movement, it is not connected with haiku,
nor any other organized religion.


The rules:

17 syllables, 5-7-5
must be written in less than 5 minutes
fuck you


Examples___________________________________________________


your poetry rhymes
like iron-maidened rack-stretched
witches confess sins


spend fifteen minutes
writing it - seven cold
days defending it


this stuff sucks baseballs
softballs footballs basketballs
through a garden hose


it does require
a seasoned awareness to
perceive genius


my poetry comes
straight from my lord and savior
attack it and burn


like a lear jet my
poetry supersonic
over your damn head


you couldn't write one
halfway decent damn poem to
save your fucking ass


if I wrote it and
you don't like it at least you
can go fuck yourself


everything I write
kicks the fucking shit out of
everything you write


criticism sucks
read it skip the details and
tell me you love it


if I wanted your
lame ass damn opinion I
would fucking ask you


just because I don't
write poetry don't mean I
can't criticize it


is not poetry
mine is mine is mine is yours
is not poetry


writing poetry
this maggot-gagging bad must
fuck up your karma


just do it this way
not that way shit not that way
just do it my way


roll this up into
a tube - now take off your pants -
sit down on it - hard


virtual don juans
desperate dick-fight for
virtual romance


I hate this so much
I'm going to come over to
your house and kill you

---------------------------------------------------------
Disclaimer for Critics:
If this offends you, you have simply misunderstood again.
---------------------------------------------------------

regards,
mcn

[garyg]

have you ever read
in your entire sad life
a single good poem


if you use the word
*soul* one more cock-sucking time
I'm going to scream


you've written your poem
with such a complete absence
of skill that it hurts


I could write better
poetry than you if I
pithed my own brain stem


sharp knitting needles
plunged deep in my eye sockets
when I read your poem


god has ordained that
I write the way I do so
suck my dick, heathen


if I ever write
as badly as you I have
friends who will kill me

[garyg]

you told us that you
try to get girls with your poems
go buy a fuck doll


you think that fourteen
lines of archaic diction
make it a sonnet

[Kim]

stop snapping your damn
fingers you pseudo beatnik
slam loving bastard

[trisha2528]

My soul bleeds for you
is a stupid fucking phrase
stitch it and fix it

---------------------------------------------------------
Borrowed Disclaimer for Critics:
If this offends you, you have simply misunderstood again.
---------------------------------------------------------

[Harry Rutherford]

Hallmark is to this
what thirty-year-old Laphroaig
is to ripe cat's piss

[Howard Miller]

You write from the heart;
obviously, you've suffered
cardiac arrest.

[Donner]

I will write for you
of cherry blossomed spring; you
slept with whom? Fuck you.

[Howard Miller]

shards of shattered hearts
waft woefully from your work--
try Kaopectate

[Kim]

Definitely is
spelled with an i not an a
you ignorant ass.

[Peter J Ross]

You wrote six poems
yesterday, none yet today.
I'm hoping you're dead.

"Sad shards of my soul",
the best piece in Merciless,
moved by some Nazi.

My speling isn't
bad, you fat facist mouron,
it's inovative.

Fuck your Stalinist
rules! You can't stop me ending
like this.

PJR :-)

[Andrea345]

put down the pen and
slowly back away and no
one's eyes will get hurt


Composed in this win-
dow, my poem's poifekt. What do
you mean, "no archives?"

[Rachel Lindley]

If you say "tuba"
one more puke-spewing time, may
you get fucked by one.

[Rachel Lindley]

If I got a dime
for each time you fucked my brain,
I'd be shitting gold.

[Rachel Lindley]

If I have to read
Bukowski shit-spawn again,
I'll swallow my tongue.