Good line breaks (question)

[joseph]

I want to know where to end a line in free verse or just where to end a line in a poem. Can someone also hint to me what is a good example of an effective line break and why it is good? Also, does anyone know a site or know of any books that have information on this topic? If anyone would care to give me some help on this subject from experience or knowledge, please do. Thanks in advance for all the help.

[Andrea345]

One piece of advice I've seen repeated is to avoid a break on an article or conjunction. These are the words: and, but, the, or, etc.
"Weak" words don't carry much stress.

hmmm, I wonder how they'd work with an enjambed line, though. Would it speed up the reader's return to the next line?

Interesting thread. I'm looking forward to reading the responses.

-a

[Shaun]

(Note: I'm going to use some examples from my poems--as well others I made up on the spot--for the purpose of saving time)

Line breaks are tentative. There's not really a set place for them. It also depends on how well the reader reads. They are instrumental in setting a mood and adding emphasis and power to words and phrases.

Most of the time line breaks are used to end a thought:

We walked in the woods,
looking at the oaks and old folks
This can make the flow extremely smooth if used correctly.


Also, a line break can be used to emphasize the action word on the end of the line:

all the while wondering
if our love would break
like the branch before.
or
Here lies death, baked
into living skeletons of men
Note how this strengthens the verb and gives a sense of hesitation or anticipation.


One of my favourite techniques to use a line break on is to use it when a conjunction comes up, so to give a power to the first without weakening the second part. See:

possibly searching for a thought
or memory to hold her mind.
Note how it makes the reader think of the first line as a complete thought--but then they are presented with a new noun to attribute to that thought.


Another advanced technique is when line breaks are combined with repetition:

would hold me still,
still as if they were cries
This allows the repetition of 'still' without making the word seem redundant. It emphasizes the word and empowers the flow.


Never break on a conjunction:
We walked with John and
talked about cars.
It kills the reading. The same usually applies for prepositional phrases (there are exceptions) and articles. You can experiment with breaking on gerunds, though. A basic rule (but can be bent) is to not break in the middle of a grammatical part of structure. For instance:

Sam Cosby walks to the store.
NOUN......VERB..PREP-PHRASE

Don't break after 'to,' 'the' or 'Sam.' You'd be interrupting the grammatical part.

There are many other forms of line breaks, including ones that do not fit into certain forms, but those are the main ones I have run into. You probably noticed my notes about how there are exceptions. There are, but you have to understand fully how to use line breaks first. Learn by experimentation. It's like cliches--the best writers can use them because they can make them fresh, intriguing and original. Also, read poems aloud. It helps when you can hear them verbally because the mouth and ear move much slower than the eye. In fact, I recommend reading each poem out loud--you miss a lot if you don't.

Hope this was of some help.

Shaun
still experimenting
on his breaks.

[This message has been edited by Shaun (edited 06-26-2001).]

[Rachel Lindley]

Another way to use linebreaks is to create alternate meanings. When the reader processes the first line, s/he may come up with one interpretation, but the moment s/he drops to the next line, the interpretation immediately changes. Words which at first appear to be nouns can become verbs when the next line is read, for example; sentences can have multilayered meanings within them based on these double interpretations. I'm going to use my own work for examples, but hopefully you'll get the idea in spite of that:

From a silly poem:
...unhinge the population with your tongue-
in-cheek, baroque communication.
Parade your lingual antics with a lung-
expectorating prestidigitation.

The first and third lines, when read by themselves, may evoke very different meanings or images for a reader than when a reader continues down to the next line. The linebreaks provide the lines with two possible meanings. The words "tongue" and "lung" serve double duty.

From an unsilly poem:
A splinter will slip inside my arch and work
its way upward, not to worry through the brain,
but to wind its root around my hips and trunk
my vertebrae...

Same thing here. The words at the end of the first and third lines have two meanings. The first comes from reading the line as a stand-alone. Then new meaning is added when the reader continues to read the sentence in the following line. In this case, "trunk" initially appears to be a noun, but upon further reading of the following line, is shown to be a verb.

Hope that helps.

Rachel

[This message has been edited by TheBroad (edited 06-27-2001).]

[Shaun]

Also, I'd like to add that separating two subsequent alliterated words can help smoothen as well as enhance the sound of the words:
the papers were folded
flat, so as to decorate
Note how the first line can be read individually without dependence on the second line, but when read fully, the second line adds to the imagery as well as the sound.

Also, I'd love to point out an excellent use of a line and strophe break by one of our posters here.

With all due respect to Adam:
Fashioning http://www.everypoet.com/poetry/poetry_forums/Forum20/HTML/000019.html

and pull your fist up top

again. Tomorrow,
The way he breaks the line to the next strophe, using 'again' to enhance the next phase of construction--this time as the student--is masterful. This is a great example of good linebreaks in a poem.

That should shed some light
on this subject.

Shaun
break one,
two, three

[joseph]

Andrea345,

Thanks for your useful advice on what not to do. It's helping me because I always used to end on conjunctions. I don't know why I thought it looked good. Again, thanks.


Shaun,

Thanks for the mini lesson. It really helped me immensly. Thanks for taking the time on both responses. One other question I have is that I don't fully understand what a gerund is. I looked it up in a dictionary and all it said was something along the lines of a verbal noun, what is that? The help would be appreciated.


TheBroad (nice name btw),

Thanks for your response as well. I've heard of doing that before and it's a really interesting method that I want to learn to use better. I've tried it unsuccessfully a few times and your examples are helping me understand it a bit more. Laters all.

Joseph

[This message has been edited by joseph (edited 06-29-2001).]

[Rachel Lindley]

Joseph, a gerund is a noun that ings. Heh. That's right. For example, in the sentence Running is extremely beneficial if you wish to improve your cardiovascular health, the word "running" -- normally a verb -- is being used as a noun. It's the subject of the whole sentence. That's a gerund.

Rachel