Rewrite Woes

[lunachick]

How do you good folk begin your rewrites?
Now this probably sounds like a completely ridiculous question to some of you, but I'm stuck!! I have a few poems that I would like to rework, but when I try I always feel like I'm making them worse. I get frustrated, I get the wrong things stuck in my mind & they won't go away to make room for what might be the right things. (I know, I know, leaving myself wide open for small mind jokes here).

So how do YOU begin to tackle your rewrite?
Should I be doing Kundalini Meditation before attempting any improvements on my writing? Or eating magic mushrooms at twilight, or something? (Please don't say I have to eat magic mushrooms! I can't afford the 'time out').

Aaaahhhhh, frustration!!!

[Dunc]

Chuck it in the drawer for three months. The only thing better is six months. Regards / Dunc

[Ted]

That's precisely what I was going to say. Time gives you perspective magic mushrooms can't even touch.

But the 'shrooms are much more fun.

Ted

[David Bowers]

Originally posted by Tedward:
But the 'shrooms are much more fun.

Ted

Hehehe. Didn't I read in a post somewhere that you're a policeman, Ted?

Dave,
smelling entrapment at 50 yards...

[Clive2]

Yep - there's no substitute for chucking it in the drawer for a good long while.

I'm still rewriting poems I wrote two years or more ago. Some of them might never be finished. There's a poem I have about being at a party which screeches to a halt after stanza 4 - always has done, always will, in all likelihood.

The point I'm making is don't be too impatient. You're not on a schedule!

[Harry Rutherford]

Originally posted by lunachick:
I have a few poems that I would like to rework, but when I try I always feel like I'm making them worse.


The leaving-in-a-drawer thing is certainly good advice; but if you haven't done much of this revision thing before, you might just be un-used to the process, in which case you need to just bite the bullet and keep at it.

Perhaps you just need to take it less seriously, if you're getting too stressed about it. Leave your favouritist poems for the time being and just write a poem which you haven't invested too much emotional energy into (as opposed to time and thought, which are still a good thing). Then force yourself to do revisions on a regular schedule- say finishing one every ten days (not every two days - it takes time).

Treat it as a learning exercise in itself. Maybe the poem will get better, maybe not; hopefully with a poem you're not too attached to, you'll be able to maintain some objectivity. They often have to get worse before they get better anyway.

But you need to get comfortable with the fact that
1) There is no Platonic ideal perfect version of the poem you are working towards/away from.

2) You can always go back to a previous draft if a revision isn't successful.

Harry
but leaving them in a drawer is good

[Rachel Lindley]

I usually do Revision Light in about a week. Revision Light is the syntactical juggling of words, focusing of imagery, and paring of excess that's generally straightforward in that it doesn't change meaning or narrative progression.

Revision Plus is the drawer revision. After having performed Revision Light, the poem gets stuck in a cabinet and in a dusty cyber file folder, along with any and all critique the poem has received. Revision Plus is the revision that requires a shift in focus in the piece, a chucking of whole strophes, a change in narrative, or somesuch. This is the revision that requires distance, and thus requires a sock drawer for a few months. Sometimes it comes out after 3 or 4 months. Sometimes 6. I have a couple that have been in there for over a year.

I have an example of Revision Light on the boards right now, in fact, where I conducted Revision Light and included the results in the thread. However, Revision Plus requires my surgical mask and latex gloves, and will be performed at a later date. Possibly much later.

Usually, the only way I know a poem is done is when, after 1 or 2 years, I can read the thing and there's no desire to tweak. That doesn't mean that the poem is "perfect" by any means; sometimes it's far, far from. But once there's no longer any desire to change something, even the smallest thing, that means the poem is either ready for submission or ready for the dustbin, because those are the only two places left for it to go.

Rachel

[Ted]

Originally posted by Useless Muse:
Hehehe. Didn't I read in a post somewhere that you're a policeman, Ted?

Dave,
smelling entrapment at 50 yards...


Yeah, but I wasn't always one.

Ted
but I never
inhaled

[lunachick]

Thank you so much for your thoughtful replies!!

I have been putting a fair amount of pressure on myself over rewrites, that's for sure. I've only just begun writing poetry, and as I see poets rewriting wonderful changes to their initial submissions in the forums within days of the original post, I'm starting to wonder if it's my self-discipline, or lack of 'talent', etc, etc.

But reading your replies is encouraging. It's not how fast you can trot out rewrites, but how distanced you can become from the initial work, that does it. That, and time.

I very much appreciate your feedback, and thanks again for sharing your different approaches on the issue of the rewrite!

Regards,
Petra
who's now working
on developing detachment



[This message has been edited by lunachick (edited 01-30-2002).]

[Alexander de Villa]

Originally posted by lunachick:
I see poets rewriting wonderful changes to
their initial submissions in the forums within days of the original post, I'm starting to wonder if it's my self-discipline, or lack of 'talent', etc, etc.(edited 01-30-2002).]

Don't be too hard on yourself. They might just be taking the shrooms. http://www.everypoet.com/poetry/poetry_forums/cool.gif

[debi z]

All the advice is good. I tend to be in Rachel's camp on this. When I'm stuck, the thing has rested long enough but still won't pull togethar than I think you have to decide if the poem is worth the rewrite. Sometimes the struggle is because the piece itself is not worth the effort. In that case save those phrases and words or lines you like, and scrap the rest. You can always use the saved stuff for another piece.
There are so many reasons that a particular piece won't come togethar that it is hard to give specific advice. Some things that work for me (sometimes):

break it down into two line couplets for revising

write the entire piece as a paragraph that reads well and makes sense, then cut it back

take all the adjectives (every one) out of it
remove all I's He's She's etc. If in its plain coat it still reads with potential, add them back in slowly


It can be especially frustrating to revise a poem with many workshop comments in mind, especially if they conflict. You have to decide what you want from the piece and then take the advice that fits that destination.

debi